Renegade Chef: Lost in translation … and a few recipes

04/09/13 - 1:35pm

I don’t have a hatred for modern technology — it’s more of a strong dislike.

Really smart people have learned how to clone sheep. Stem-cell research may allow us to live forever. Soon we’ll be going to the optometrist to have Google installed in our retinas.

And all I really wanted was someone to show me how to get the “Y”-bones out of a northern, or maybe how to throw a curveball — you know, something useful.

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Renegade Chef: My Irish bi-valves are smiling

03/12/13 - 6:35pm

I think creatures that live inside their shells find claustrophobia to be an on-going malady. Sure, the rent is cheap and the location conveniently close to work—but can you imagine being shut inside two shells all day long with nothing but kelp and a Phish CD to keep you occupied?

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Renegade Chef: A bloody experiment

02/27/13 - 11:33am

I know a bartender who makes a mean Bloody Mary. I’ll call him Bill, because that’s his name.

He would love to market his secret recipe but “Bill’s BM Mix” sounds more like the name of a bike store, or worse, something unfit to drink.

If you think this is where I unveil Bill’s magic method for concocting the best Bloody Mary this side of Jenkins — well, you are sadly mistaken. Bill won’t part with it.

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Renegade Chef: We need comfort in 2013

01/02/13 - 5:09pm

We are survivors.

The end of the world — a rather hybrid hypothesis born from the minds of ancient Mayans, Nostradamus, Leonardo da Vinci and the History Channel — has come and gone.

Some of us may be disappointed.

After all, we are facing a “fiscal cliff” (as of this writing), unemployment is still rampant and the recession can’t decide whether to depress or progress.

North Korea and Iran want to blow someone up and they don’t like us, in particular.

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Renegade Chef: Can Santa save us from Armageddon?

12/19/12 - 11:47am

Dear Santa:

I am writing this letter to thank you for the wonderful gifts you left under the tree for me last Christmas. It never ceases to amaze me how year after year you bring everything on my wish list.

The Happy Feet Penguin socks, Spiderman underwear and the fake arrow-through-the-head prop were certainly well used in 2012! “365 Rutabaga Recipes for Every Day of the Year” has a permanent home on my coffee table — primarily because it’s glued on with spilled root beer — but by gosh, we tried every recipe!

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Renegade Chef: Christmas candy conundrum

12/17/12 - 7:53pm

I have been wondering for a long, long time: Whatever happened to the magic of Christmas candy? Where did it go?

It seems, these days, holiday treats are pretty much the same thing we get every other day of the year. The big candy conglomerates have tricked us into thinking Snickers, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups and Hershey’s Kisses are extra special simply because they are festively wrapped for the holiday season. Unwrapped, this candy might as well be left over from Halloween.

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Renegade Chef: Lost in translation … and a few recipes

Renegade Chef: My Irish bi-valves are smiling

Renegade Chef: A bloody experiment

Renegade Chef: We need comfort in 2013

Renegade Chef: Can Santa save us from Armageddon?

Renegade Chef: Christmas candy conundrum

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